When I am dead, I want people to remember me based on three things. How I lived, how I loved and how I learned to let go. Today when I woke up, I felt that I needed to explain what I mean by letting go.
Letting go of our past and our pain does not mean forgetting them. Forgetting is not something that we do, it is something that happens to us. I cannot will myself to forget any more than I can will myself to remember. All of us, we are the residue of our experiences, whether we remember them or not, whether can articulate them or not. It is paramount that we do not forget where we come from, those who have left indelible footprints in our lives for they all contribute to who and what we are today. Letting go does not mean that we forget, because if somehow we are reminded we would then be at the mercy of our pain once again. This way we can never truly let go. Letting go does not mean that we forget, it means we accept that the past is the past, and start to dream about tomorrow. Letting go means does not mean that we forget, it means that the episode in our lives, no matter how deep or how long it has lasted, no longer has any impact on our present selves.
After we let go, we move on. As long as I continue to hold on to my past, I cannot move on to greener pastures. I deny myself all the goodness of a future that is so real for a silver of memory.
I have had many negative experiences, I have lied, cheated and stole, lost friends from lying, betrayed the trust of those who loved me, have been walked out on, walked away from a crying face. After every single episode I felt a regret, a great remorse, but I take a deep breath and tell myself that I must strong, let go and move on.
Because I don’t want my tombstone to say
“Here lies Vernon, who could not let go”
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